Cool Girl

The excerpt below is from the book. Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, [..] and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she’s hosting the world’s biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl. Men actually think this girl exists. Maybe they’re fooled because so many women are willing to pretend to be this girl. For a long time Cool Girl offended me. I used to see men – friends, coworkers, strangers – giddy over these awful pretender women, and I’d want to sit these men down and calmly say: You are not dating a woman, you are dating a woman who has watched too many movies written by socially awkward men who’d like to believe that this kind of woman exists and might kiss them. I’d want to grab the poor guy by his lapels or messenger bag and say: The bitch doesn’t really love chili dogs that much – no one loves chili dogs that much! And the Cool Girls are even more pathetic: They’re not even pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be. Oh, and if you’re not a Cool Girl, I beg you not to believe that your man doesn’t want the Cool Girl. It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs; or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics. There are variations to the window dressing, but believe me, he wants Cool Girl, who is basically the girl who likes every fucking thing he likes and doesn’t ever complain. (How do you know you’re not Cool Girl? Because he says things like: “I like strong women.” If he says that to you, he will at some point fuck someone else. Because “I like strong women” is code for “I hate strong women.”)” I waited patiently-years-for the pendulum to swing the other way, for men to start reading Jane Austen, learn how to knit, pretend to love cosmos, organize scrapbook parties, and make out with each other while we leer. And then we’d say, Yeah, he’s a Cool Guy. But it never happened. Instead, women across the nation colluded in our degradation! Pretty soon Cool Girl became the standard girl. Men believed she existed- she wasn’t just a dreamgirl one in a million. Every girl was supposed to be this girl, even if you weren’t, then something was wrong with you. ― Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl

Where I quote Seinfeld

                                                           Img Source

We all know one of  'those' couples. You know the kind you see in the posters picnic-ing  with their perfect  blanket and the perfect picnic baskets raising their glasses to toast something along the lines of  'Here's to you ,You complete me' . Atleast, that is what I think they are toasting to, in my head! Sadly, I realized we are not one of them! sigh!

This is the exact conversation that happens between my husby and I sometimes on a saturday afternoon!

JERRY Why do I always have the feeling that everybody's doing something better than me on Saturday afternoons?
ELAINE This is what people do.
JERRY No they don't. They're out on some big picnic. They're cooking burgers. They're making out on blankets. They're not at some mall in Jersey watching their friends trying to find the world's cheapest air-conditioner.

Except Jerry would be ME and ELAINE would be my husby! And replace 'They're not ...." withsome equally boring thing like "Except they are not watching back-to-back movies on Netflix or except they don't get up at 11 in the morning and cry that the entire day is gone " or something like that.

We (atleast I) have been planning to get out early on a saturday and just go sit in the park with a blanket and some sandwiches and have a 'picnic' . But little did we know it is a long process.

First, you need to get up atleast before 10 on a saturday ( and that has never ever happened)
Second, You need to buy a picnic hamper and knowing you and your tendency to get bored of things so easily and quickly, your husband would refuse to spend on a picnic hamper .
Third, you need to get up and make sandwiches or some 'picnic-ky' snack . Refer to point 1.
Fourth, you need to dress up nice and not spend your saturday in sweats.

So, we will let you know if one day we do manage to get our lazy asses off the couch and pose like this couple ..One can dream right ?;)